Just a Saturday

by Rhonda McAnulty on Saturday, May 21, 2011 at 10:43pm

So happy to see my girl scouts today! What a great group of girls! They earned sooo many badges this year! Then Miss Olivia and I went to do a little retail therapy. Then to visit the Billings/ Blackweasel newest edition. I thought for sure I would have the baby bug, but as I held that little bundle of joy, I was content in all things. I reminded myself that God saw that we have 3 beautiful children and all is in his perfect plan. I've been struggling with something lately. I've been struggling with pride and if what I am sharing is prideful. I don't ever want my experieces to bring others to look at me, but to look at my creator and the one whom I put all of my trust. I had friends awhile back that had said I tend to be dramatic and create drama in my life for...attention. I am trying to stay as far away from that as possible. I want God's glory to be seen. I am sharing my thoughts, and experiences so that others can see there is a real God, who really cares about us. This cancer isn't about me. It's about God glory. I am only ONLY a vessel, a tool and my use, my goal is to show God's love. He loves me! He didn't GIVE me cancer, He sees the cancer but He wants me to walk this path loving Him and showing others there isn't blame for God here. I believe God knows all and sees all and is in control of all. Can He just take it away? Absolutely! Will He? I don't know but I trust Him to walk me through this. He loves me, just as love my children. I want my children to grow to mature and sometimes that means growing pains. I don't create the pains nor do I steer my children into the pain, but I am with them when they are learning how to make it through the pain. I love them too much to let them stay babies for ever. I hope this all makes sence and I know there will come a time when I re-read this for strength and hope