11.14.11 Another Monday

So it's not even NEAR the end of the day, but I have to get this out. My kids come home from school soon and I have to get this out. Tears, sadness. I don't want to do this. I don't want to go back to Anchorage. I don't want to fight, I don't want to even get out of bed. I have these amazing highs and lows to the lowest. Trying, to just be done with emotions. I love my kids so much I don't want them to see me hurting. They know I do, I want to wrap my arms around them and hug and kiss them to no end. Elizabeth kept me strong this morning, playing restaurant and barbies and laughing, laughing. She calls me near, so I will end for now. Keep praying folks as I let go and let GOD. I am weak and HE IS MADE STRONG. Love you, love me, love you, love me.